In Episode 93 and other episodes this summer, we are taking a break from our normal programming to share with you some unreleased episodes from the Coaching Character Podcast, which Phil recorded with Coach Roz, who played football for the Oakland...
In Episode 93 and other episodes this summer, we are taking a break from our normal programming to share with you some unreleased episodes from the Coaching Character Podcast, which Phil recorded with Coach Roz, who played football for the Oakland Raiders and San Diego State, and now runs The Playmakers, which works with at-risk and developmentally different children. This is great content that we wanted to ensure got the airtime it deserves. In this episode, Coach Roz and Phil talk with Darrell Garrettson, Offensive Analyst for University of Arizona, and former quarterback for Utah State and Oregon State, about the lessons he learned playing for and coaching with his dad (and what we all can learn from his experiences), how to prepare for life after sports, and much more.
Resources and Links from this Episode
Welcome back to how soccer explains leadership, where we are helping you understand life and leadership lessons that we can learn from the beautiful game I'm Phil Darke. Your host Paul Jobson my co-host and I absolutely love bringing you incredible interviews with great people from around the world of soccer this summer. However, we are taking a little break from that usual great content. We're bringing you other great content.
These are actually the lost episodes of the coaching character podcast that I did with a good friend of mine. Coach Roz. He was an NFL player. He now runs an organization called Playmakers and doing incredible work with, vulnerable kids. From around the country. So we are going through that this summer just to, just to give Paul and I little break from the normal programming.
This episode we have for you today is a really, really good conversation that we were able to have with Darrell [00:01:00] Garrettson. He's now an offensive analyst
For the university of Arizona. He has a great. resume that we are going to talk about. And he played some college football at Utah state and Oregon state. We're going to talk a little bit about that. We're going to talk about what it was like to play for his dad and what we can learn in that father, son coaching relationship, or any parent child coaching relationship, how it can make the most of that. We also drew out of that really good lessons for you parents out there about how you can best engage your kids after games, how you can encourage your kids, how you can.
Hopefully spur your kids on to be better players and just better kids all around the most important thing is how they are as human beings. At the end. We also talk about life after sport and really the idea of your, your glory days, so to speak are going to end at some point. So how can you prepare yourself?
How can you prepare the players that you coach. For that [00:02:00] transition. We talk about all that and a little bit more. In this episode. Without more for me, we're going to get to that interview. Right now.
[00:02:08] Coach Roz: Welcome to coaching character. I'm coach Roz along with my partner, coach Phil Darke and we are excited about today's episodes. We're always excited. We get to talk to a young man that I have known since he was a kid and his accomplishments are. Are amazing.
It is Darrell Garrettson and Darrell is most recently been the quarterback at Oregon state. Prior to that, he was at Utah state came from Chandler high school and they are, I, they just continue to win the state championship every year. He is coached by his dad at Chandler.
Rick Garrettson and Phil
[00:02:46] Darrell: let's get going. Yeah, I'm excited too. Darrell. Welcome. Thanks for having me.
[00:02:51] Phil: Yeah, absolutely. Well, you know, we're, again, you know, it seems like this is kind of the normal course of business here on our podcast. Coach Roz keeps [00:03:00] introducing to me, these people who are, you know, like part of his family.
So I feel like I'm coming into family reunions. This is basically what this is, which is really cool. but Darrell, you know, we're gonna talk a lot. about a lot of cool things this this morning. But the really one of the things that I love to hear is just, you know, Roz just gave a little bit of your bio, but that's on paper.
I'd love to hear from you. You know, you're not, you're not quite as old as us, so you don't have as much story, but you still have cool story. So I love just hearing your story. Just what makes you, you how'd, you get to be where you are today, you know? And you've had quite, quite a lot of pretty, pretty amazing experiences that not many people get to experience.
[00:03:39] Darrell: can you tell us about that? Yeah, so I was born and raised in Southern California. I was born in Fullerton and lived in Anaheim Hills till I was about 11 years old. Obviously I'm the product of a coach's son. So my dad, for as long as I've been alive, he's been coaching high school football. I've been around it.
Literally since I was born, my dad coached at Servite high [00:04:00] school from 1989 to 2004. And he was the offensive coordinator there starting in, I believe in 1991. And then you know, kind of carried his career through on, on, out there. And I, I was always around sports. I was always around football,
my. You know, my family background, so to speak is, is also in the NBA and in, in basketball as well with my uncle and and my grandfather that I'm named after. But you know, I was kind of brought in, in all, in all three sports, football, baseball, and basketball. I was a well-rounded athlete. And didn't really start specializing quote unquote in football until really I was in eighth grade.
And I kind of made the decision that I really wanted to play. And in eighth grade, in, in 2005, we rewind that in 2005, when I was 11, we moved to channel Arizona or Gilbert, Arizona where I came out here. And that was my first experience of actually being coached by my dad, which was the greatest thing I could have, I could have ever done was, was finally opening up and asking my dad to coach me like one of his Servite football players.
He he was always [00:05:00] producing and stuff like that. So, once that kind of happened, it it took off from there. Me and my dad developed a great relationship and you know, we had a really good relationship throughout that time. And even through high school, when he coached me in high school he was only my position coach one year in, in high school my senior year.
But besides that he was, he was he was awesome. And then I went on to college. After Chandler high school, I went to Utah state played two years, won a bowl game. You know, had some had some pretty cool games, was a part of some really cool team victories and some upsets, and then transferred to Oregon state and, and sat out my first year there and then played my last two years at Oregon state.
And it was it was all said and done after.
[00:05:42] Phil: So a couple things there, first of all, you know, I'm really feeling old right now. I'm not gonna lie because you're talking about your dad coaching Servite while I was at mission Viejo high school. And you weren't even born so at that's pretty fantastic, first of all, but secondly, you know, you talk really about being coached by your dad.
I, [00:06:00] I was, I had the pleasure and privilege of being coached by my dad. He wasn't quite the, the stalwart coach that your dad is. But my dad coached me growing up, playing soccer, and I cherish those memories with my dad. And it sounds like you do as well, but you know, we all know though, you know, and I know just being coached by my dad a little bit.
I know coaching my daughter in, in soccer and, and my, some of my other kids as well, that it's not all there's, there are some cons to being coached by your, by. Parent as well. So I I'd just love for you to talk about a little bit here. Some of the advantages and the disadvantages, really the pros and cons of being, being coached by your dad from, from your perspective as, as the son,
[00:06:43] Darrell: well, being coached by my dad was one of the best things I could have ever.
Let happen. So to speak. My dad wasn't necessarily one of those guys that was always pushing on me to do something. My dad was very receptive and very, you [00:07:00] know, if he wants to do it, he'll come to me and he'll make that decision himself. And I did you know, when, right before we moved to Arizona, you know, I went up to my dad and I, I finally asked this is right when I turned 11 and I told him, I said, Hey, I, I want you to coach me like you do your Servite quarterback.
And my dad was kind of shocked a little bit, but he was like, all right, if that's what you want to do, you know, I'm, I'm, I'm gonna treat you how I treat my quarterbacks. I'm not gonna treat you how I treat you because you're my son. Now obviously as time developed, you know, I was held at a higher standard playing and, and obviously knowing the offense and all that type of stuff with my dad as a coach.
But that's just what, how. You know, came across to me as far as just hold yourself to a higher standard than a lot of other people, because you're gonna have a lot more eyes on you. Your dad's a coach, you're playing quarterback. The first thing people are gonna sit there and say is, oh, well, that's just daddy ball.
So [00:08:00] the only thing you can do to get out of that daddy ball conversation is to be a really good player. And That was one of those things that whatever sport I was in, I always push myself to be the best. And that's just because that's how I was taught. It came from not only my dad, but my mom and, you know, people that were surrounded me, it was always, if you're gonna do something, be, be the best at it.
So, but you know, like I said, they're also are, those are a lot of pros to it, but there's also cons to it. I know a lot of kids feel too much pressure when their parents are coaching. And that's something that can happen. That's something that happened a little bit, not so much with my dad, because whenever I was being coached by my dad, I felt like I had all the confidence in the world because I had my dad coaching me.
And I wouldn't be, I felt as if I wouldn't be steered down a bad path. So it was one of those things, you know, there's a lot of, you know, there's a lot of things that go into the father and the. [00:09:00]Coaching relationship and it can be tough. And there's, there's gonna be days where you're gonna yell and scream at each other.
There's gonna be days where you laugh and you throw an arm over around each other and you can't believe what you just did. And the amount of success that you have is, is ultimately shared because you know, they're putting in just amount of time as, as, as you are. I mean, they gotta take you to the field, they gotta drop you off.
They gotta sit and wait and watch. You know, so they're, they're a part of the process as well. And I think that was the great part that me and my dad were able to build that separated us, I think, from having that toxic relationship between player you know, between father and son and coach and player was the fact that my dad did a really good job of not taking football home.
Whenever we got home football was left at football. and if it was some, if football did get brought up, it was by me. It was never by my dad. It was never, my dad was a real [00:10:00] big stickler on that personally. I think my mom was a real big stickler on him about being like that. But also it was, it was one of those, it was one of those deals where I think he did a great job at that, and I know that's sometimes very, very hard to do for.
For some parents and, and, and, and dads and, and kids. So, but me and my dad had a lot of communication. We talked a lot. We there, we always talked, you know, talked a lot. There'd be days where I'd be crying and he'd be ripping me, you know, and there'd be, you'd have to finally have those feelings come out of, you know, Hey, am I being too hard on you?
Yeah. You know what dad, you are. You're you're, you're going a little overboard on. You know, and, and, you know, he would reel it back. So there was, there was a lot of communication looking back on it now between me and my dad that really developed that relationship and turned it turned into what it became.
[00:10:50] Coach Roz: So Darrell, let me, let me rewind for just a second. Visualize yourself at a coaching clinic for youth coaches, which hopefully you will be. What I heard you say and would be, [00:11:00] would these be two of the bullet points where it doesn't work is when pressure is applied by coach to the kid at a level that is not healthy.
Is that a, is that a bullet?
[00:11:14] Darrell: Correct. And, and I think you can see that in the parent as well parents are watching other parents too. I, you know, that's, that's the one thing I think coaches seem to forget about sometimes is, you know, parents, parents do watch other parents as well. And sometimes you see, Hey, you know, that, that dad wants it more than the kid.
And, and that's, and, and that kind of is the boundary that you gotta, you gotta walk of, you know, Hey, am I pushing my kid or do I want it? And I think I think that that's a hard line to Teeter so to speak for, for, for certain people. And you know, it's one of those things where you just gotta, you gotta feel things out and you gotta understand you gotta understand where people are at.
You got, you have to communicate. I think. Looking back on it. The best thing that me and my dad did was, was [00:12:00] plain and simple communicate
[00:12:01] Coach Roz: well. And the, and the second point that I heard was leave it on the field. It ends at the field and I, and again, I'm just, I'm picturing us in a, in a clinic setting of how many youth coaches, if, if they'll be really, really transparent, I'm gonna push my kid harder because I believe he's got the ability and, and I believe he can play at the next level.
And how do you, how do you really, really separate that? So one, there's gonna be a great deal of coaches that are gonna naturally push their kids harder. Darrell's saying. And, and then number two, you gotta leave it on the field so that I'm hoping that's, those are takeaways. Those are, those are takeaways, Phil.
Oh one more thing I gotta rewind on really important. I'm interviewing you. I hear about the legend Darrell of Mission Viejo ho now, correct me if I'm wrong. That's a bunch of spoiled kids that get driven [00:13:00] to school daily. Isn't it? Tell me all I'm getting is one perspective of mission Viejo
[00:13:07] Phil: I think he's asking you a question there,
[00:13:09] Darrell: Darrell.
Yeah. Darrell throw me away on mission VA Darrell, but yeah. Tell, well, I haven't been around there. I haven't been around there in a while, but you know, back in the day mission. Yeah. They, they were now mission Viejo also is a public school. So, you know, they're kind of separated from the you know, the Santa margaritas and.
You know, the Jay Sarahs down there and the S and all that, they're kind of, they're a little bit separated from that area. You know, you got your, I would say them in San Clemente are kind of their you know, kinda the same entity, so to speak where. It's a public school, but you know, they got a little money yeah.
[00:13:50] Coach Roz: school mentality, right.
[00:13:51] Darrell: Entitled all day let's
[00:13:54] Phil: let's say it's a lot like Folsom high . It's, it's basically the same community in Southern Cal, but actually [00:14:00] back then. Right, right. When, before you were leaving. Actually before you were born, actually is when, and then right before you were leaving, is when mission was the powerhouse and really the, yeah, the dynasties.
So it was when my brother was playing there and then kind of Sanchez and all Taman and all those guys who, who came through the early, early two thousands. But we're not, we're not talking about that today. That that's that's
[00:14:22] Darrell: conversation for
[00:14:23] Phil: another day. Yeah. So, but there, one thing I wanna, I wanna pick up on there were there ever times when.
Whether before or after you you were, you know, your dad was coaching you that you felt like, you know, and you've seen it in whether it's movies or you've heard about it with, with coaches where their kids are. Like, I want my dad back. I feel like you're, you're, you've been gone and, you know, were you, did you ever feel that way that your dad was like, you know, quote unquote, the, the father to all these boys and you were getting neglected.
Did you ever have conversations with him about that? [00:15:00] If, if it was there and if not, how, you know, I think you may have already done this, but I'd love for you to talk to coaches out there who coach their kids and give advice from the son's perspective of here's some things my dad did. That wasn't as big of an issue or never was an issue, or if it was here's how we talked about it and here's how he remedied it.
Does that question make
[00:15:19] Darrell: sense? Yeah, no, I, to be honest, my dad never to me seemed like he was too far gone and it was, you know, I want my dad back. Obviously I've grown up my dad coaching football, my whole entire life. Mm-hmm . Really that transition. It wasn't tough for me to deal with once he got back into football at the high school level, again, because there was a time period from when we moved out there from 2005 until 2000.
And. 10, he didn't coach high school football. He coached my pop Warner team. And we did really well. We were a really good little youth team and you know, we had some good players, players go play, you know, division one baseball. I played football. [00:16:00] We had a kid named Sean Harlow on our team who was with the Atlanta Falcons.
Now he was a fifth round pig. I mean, you know, and, and his, his dad's pat Harlow, the head coach at J Sarah. Catholic school down in, down in Southern Cal. So, you know, I've kind of always been around him and known him as a football coach. So I never, I was always around people that kind of looked at my dad as a father figure.
I never, I never felt threatened by that in a way where, you know, I got jealous or it was, Hey, you know, my dad's being too much of a, you. Of a person that they can look up to. And, and I know my dad you know, is a, is a very good, very good person. And I know a lot of people and a lot of kids like him and they look up to him because he is a straight shooter.
And he'll tell you the truth, whether it's something you want to hear or it's something you don't want to hear. So I never, I never really got that, you know, too far gone coach feeling from my dad. But I will say when I got to, when I, once I got to [00:17:00] college, and my dad was no longer coaching me anymore.
The bond that me and my dad created as friends and more so as you know, he goes, he went from being a dad to, he's not my best friend and it wasn't, you know, it was no longer feeling like, oh, you know, I gotta, you know, my dad's on my case about this. Like as soon as I was gone, it was, you know, This is, this is gonna be, you know, a, a friend relationship, so to speak where, you know, he's still my dad, but you know, my dad is still, my dad is, is, is my best friend.
And, and he knows me, you know, better than better than anybody. Even better than myself. Like he probably predict what I'm gonna do tomorrow. And I couldn't tell you what I'm doing tomorrow. So.
[00:17:46] Phil: That sounds. That sounds awesome. It sounds like you know, I gotta, I gotta meet your dad. He sounds like a great guy.
And I, I'm very encouraged by that and I think what, what I, what I heard there, and I would say, you know, from a dad that I try to do with, when I [00:18:00] coach my kids is, as you said, whether it's leaving on the field, but I think more importantly than that, make sure your kid knows that they are your. And you're their dad and, you know, you're their one dad and that these other kids that they're coaching have a very different relationship with you than, than you have with them.
And it sounds like he did that with you. Am I right there?
[00:18:21] Darrell: Yeah, 100%. I mean, he just, you know, obviously there's times where, and, and I want to make it very clear. Now there, there were times where like, I absolutely was. Not a fan of my dad. Okay. There were times where he was on my case so much where I was like, dude, all right, dude.
Like we gotta relax. There are those times, but I'm better for, I I'm better for it. He knew what he was doing. He knew what buttons to push. He knew how far to push it. He knew exactly how far he could take it. And. You know, obviously a little bit, a little bit of that is trial and error and kind of figuring me [00:19:00] out as, as I got older, but you know, you're gonna have those bumps in the road.
It's not gonna be, you know, I know I kind of made it sound like it was a, a great clear picture and we're, you know, we were, you know, skyrocketing into the top of the mountain. No, there's, there's gonna be those jaggeds in that mountain range, you know where you're going up and you're coming down and you're going back up and you're coming down.
I mean, it's a it's a rollercoaster it's it's life at the end of the day. It's it's life. And my, my, my dad's been able to navigate you know, life raising a son. I feel like pretty well.
[00:19:29] Coach Roz: Well, and, and one of the things that I do know is beginning with your grandfather. And your dad and your uncle, when you're talking about getting ripped, you have not been ripped until you've been ripped by Garretson, right?
[00:19:44] Darrell: Yeah. Yeah. Especially, especially the OG. You know, Garson first one, you don't know what, you don't know what a tongue lashing is until you get one from him. And I'm sure, Greg you've heard a couple of him. You might have been part of one or two. . [00:20:00] Exactly. Hey, I wanna, you. You've never heard. You've never heard so many curse words in your life that all made sense.
yeah, he can. He,
[00:20:07] Coach Roz: he can make, he can make it a noun, a verb, an
[00:20:09] Darrell: adjective. so, anyway, Hey I just
[00:20:12] Phil: wanna say one thing, I'm glad you went there and talked about the, the valleys and the peaks and stuff, because otherwise I think people would be like, okay, This guy's blowing smoke because we know you were a kid and we know that you were a teenager.
Right. And so if you told us then either you're like the one kid that never had those issues or, you know, or you're lying. Right. So, I, I think that we all know that and understand that, but I think that what you're saying here is, you know, your dad was there and he made sure you knew that you were his.
He knew that his responsibility as dad to you was the most important responsibility he had to any kid in, in the world,
[00:20:52] Darrell: you know, I'm
[00:20:54] Coach Roz: sorry, Darrell. One of the things that, that you're given us such good information here, [00:21:00] again, I'm thinking about a kid who's, who's looking at Darrell and you've achieved a great deal.
I got a two part question for. Talk about some of the valleys because a kid might think it was all just , you know, a, a, a steady, uphill climb. Will you, will you do two things? Will you talk about some of the valleys? And will you talk about when the game was most fun?
[00:21:27] Darrell: Yeah, so, I mean, throughout my career there, you know, there's a good amount of valleys.
I'll say that more. So, you know, in, in high school Not really, not really so many valleys as there were you know, like my freshman year we didn't do, we didn't do too well, you know, as a freshman team. And that was my first time really losing cuz when I was coached by my dad and you know, I was part of my youth teams and stuff like that.
We lost one game in three years. So going to Chandler and playing on the freshman team and losing was, was something that you know, was tough to deal with. And that's something [00:22:00] that my dad had to kind of navigate and steer me. How to change your mindset and how to, how to bring it every day and how to not let the outside noise affect you and kind of just putting your blinders on and, and doing your job to the best of your ability.
So you can win a ball game because you ultimately love playing this sport. And we all want to be good at this sport. And we all want to, you know, have our place cemented and great news. Y yada, all that type of stuff. Right. ultimately at the end of the day, my dad was able to navigate me through and tell me that, Hey, you know, if, if you choose this road, you know, I've seen a lot of it.
This is what happens. Or if you choose this one, you can have some really good things happen to you. So I think that was, I understood how much my dad knew and how much and how much my dad was around the game and how he saw kids. Had it all and lost it and had [00:23:00] it all and took advantage or didn't have anything at all took advantage of one opportunity.
And next thing, you know, onto a great thing or the opposite kid, you know, made one mistake, never came back from it. Right. And I think that was the best thing that my dad did for me was developmental toughness in me. The ability to be able to go through hard times, but also. A quote that I like to use, that he uses a bunch.
Now he stole from a guy named Matt Wells. Who's the head coach at Texas tech. And he was my, he was my head coach at Utah state. And he was a quarterback as well. And the one, the one saying he always had that has stuck in my mind. And, and my dad's mind for a really long time is stay medium. You know, you're never too high.
You're never too low. You're always, you're always that steady person. That everybody looks to in the room when things are going really good. You're the guy humbling. Everybody when things are going [00:24:00] really bad, you're the guy picking everybody up and making sure their spirits aren't too low. You gotta find that, find that fine line of, of being medium.
And I never heard that until I got to college, but it was something that I was like, oh wow. My dad's been, you know, teaching me to do that since I be like that since I was basically being coached by him. You know, I think that's a lot of the other thing too, that parents miss on is the mental toughness and building mental toughness and being able to.
Navigate your kid through mental, you know, lulls and you know, like a kid playing baseball, you're going through a slump. You can't get a hit. It's been three tournaments in a row and you've gone, oh four, or maybe you get one hit and it's a bloop single or something like that. You gotta be able to navigate that as a dad to pick your son up your son's in a low place.
You can't sit there and. Harping on him and, oh, you're still doing bad. You're still doing well. That kid's just gonna keep on down and down and down and down, you gotta be able to, [00:25:00] you know, you know, lick your finger, put your finger out to the air and kind of find the wind of the direction of what's going on here.
You know, you can't you can't just be blind to everything and you can't have blinders on, you gotta take a step back and, and realize what kids need and what really kids need is, is confidence really? Because it's. It's so easy for a young kid, a youth kid to sit there and lose confidence when some other kid does something better than him, you know?
And, and it's, and it's, and it's hard to sometimes get, get across the kids. You know, I'm a coach as well. So, and I coach kids all the way from eight years old, I have, you know, a, a kid that I coached that's at BYU and I got another college kid as well. And so. What you see in that, in that disparity is the young kids are very much so, so observant that if they can't do something that sometimes, you know, you've gotta find that mental realm to where it's like, Hey, no, no, no.
You're capable of doing that. [00:26:00] You're just so young. You gotta understand practice and practice and just keep repetition and doing it over and over again. So, and then you know, to your second part of your question of the best times of playing football, I'll be honest. The best time playing football was high school football, Friday nights under the lights with my friends, with your friends in the stands, watching you, your rival high school in the opposite stands talking crap to you.
You guys, after the game, meet up at the local in and out. And you know, you guys are talking about the game and everybody from each school's intermingling and stuff like that, you know, I thought, I thought Friday nights were, were the best thing ever. I mean, it was so much. You know, and it was, it was one of those things that you look back on.
And you know, as I got older, obviously college football was great. I had some great moments in, in college football as well, but the, every day of high school football was just, was just great.
[00:26:52] Coach Roz: That's the golden stuff. Huh? Quick rewind. You said your coaching, somebody at
[00:26:56] Darrell: BYU. Yeah. I, I was able to [00:27:00] you know, I was fortunate enough to train Jacob conver a.
For a couple times before he went up to BYU, he was a former Chandler quarterback that won three state titles in a row with my dad. And so, you know, obviously we've had a really strong connection for, for a while. And you know, he was on his he was returning from his mission. So, you know, from his mission, I was, I was kind of getting him back into shape before he was heading up to BYU and.
And doing that thing. So he's he's doing well. I can't,
[00:27:28] Coach Roz: I can't believe your dad and I are Aztecs. I can't believe he would let you say BYU in the house.
[00:27:35] Darrell: Well, Hey, remember, I also didn't like BYU either. All right. I was, I was up there in Logan, you either. And, and, and we came down and, and, you know, we had to, you know, we had to set things, set things straight to the record for the record books, but you know, it, BYU is a you.
Whoever my, wherever my kids that I coach go, you know, I'm a huge fan. I'm a huge fan. .
[00:27:56] Coach Roz: Gotcha. All right. This is cool.
[00:27:59] Darrell: This is cool. [00:28:00] So
[00:28:01] Phil: one of the things that you talked about, and I think even going, talking about you now have our coaching people who are playing at the college level at the D one level. So you play D one and you know, when you play D one, presumably you have the hopes of going to the next level from there, right?
You, you want to go to the NFL and I know that you had those hopes and dreams, and I know that a lot of other people have those hopes and dreams. So. I also know that when you are coaching someone who, you know, has that potential talent, you're really pushing them to get there. Right. Because you know, you know, they want to get there and you know, what it takes to get there.
But I think what happens though also is the flip side of that is when you don't get there, It could be a real low, low, and it usually is right for the people who are just on the cusp, as I, as I've talked to Roz about, it's easier when you stink and you're not close to going. Right. But when you're on that cusp and you're like this close, I can taste it.
What would [00:29:00] you, you know, and, and it's, it's a fine line, right? You don't want to talk about that side of things and have people get bummed out and not push harder, but at the same time, what, what do you think coaches can do to prepare. The kids that they're coaching and the young men that they're coaching for, you know, that unknown part of it that you might not make it.
And here's what that looks like. Or, or is it just something that you have to deal with and talk about it after the fact? What, what do you think about that and what would you recommend for coaches and what, what would you think about with your, you know, with your players that you're coaching?
[00:29:33] Darrell: I mean, I would, the first thing I would say is you know, I would.
Always have a plan. You know, and I guys used to say this all the time when they would come back and talk to us at Oregon state and Utah state, it was, Hey guys, you know, football's not forever. You guys gotta make sure you have a plan. You gotta make sure you have a plan, you know, for a while, you know, you kind of just blow 'em off and I'll be, I'll be honest.
You know, for a while you kind of just sit there. You're like, all right guys, you know, whatever, I'm gonna keep playing football. You know, you [00:30:00] feel invincible. You really do. You know, and it's a humbling, it's a humbling experience. I'll tell you. But the one thing that, you know, I, I have told my guys it's it's network, right.
Network, as much as you can, while you're in college network, as much as you can, wherever you go. It, it, it doesn't matter network and treat everybody the same, you know, don't treat someone extra special because you know, their dad is such and such. Who's the CEO or don't, you know, you gotta treat everybody the same.
You want people to have the same report, you know, when they talk to you, cuz you never know you might network with person a and person w they somehow know each other cuz they bumped into each other at a run in and Hey, you know, Darrell Garson yeah, I know Dar Darrell's awesome. Oh, I've heard nothing but great things.
I've heard, you know, I've had great experiences with him too. And now all of a sudden they're talking about you and next thing you know, you could be landing a job opportunity. Out of the blue like that. And, and it happens [00:31:00] like that. So, you know, I always tell guys network as much as you can go to those networking events that school set up.
I know a lot of colleges now, especially football programs, they're doing a lot of, a lot better job. I know specifically Oregon state has a financial literacy thing that they're doing with their guys, which I think is absolutely fantastic. I think that's something. Is clearly missed in the sport world talking about money because it seems like all professional athletes tend to just and blow all their money.
So, you know, they've done a great job with that and really just just having a plan and, and making sure you're studying what you want to study. You know, cuz at the end of the day, What you study has to go into a field that, you know, you think you can get into and, and, and work. So it's it's, it's an interesting, it's an interesting feeling.
You know, it, there is a, there is a very low valley. I will say that I was fortunate enough to be blessed with an opportunity to go work with a guy named Rudy carpent. You know, who has a sports management company. And so I was able to intern, you know, once I kind of [00:32:00] closed the books on, on my career, so to speak and I was able to stay in the quote unquote football world and and, and evaluating talent sort of speak.
So that was that was a blessing for me because I'm sure that would've, you know, that would've been a, a lot harder task for me to kind of navigate. If, if I didn't have that opportunity with Rudy and I'm, I'm really thankful for, for his presence in that.
[00:32:24] Phil: Absolutely. And I think one thing too, that, that, that I think about there is, you know, you really talked about the practical side of things there, right?
Like you talked about the, have a plan, you talked about the network, you talked about, you know, the, the, at just these other things that are necessary to have them write major, so on and so forth. But I'm curious on the more on the mental side, more on the emotional side, more on the identity, right. Just, you know, you've always been a football player.
You're the son of a football coach. You're a football player. You're the quarterback. You're the quarterback at high school. You're the quarterback at college, you know, [00:33:00] you're big time. Right. And then. Football's gone now. I mean, obviously you're working still in the game, but you were, that, that was fine.
What would you say as far as that goes, as far as that side of it, as far as the identity, as far as the, the difficulty there, how would you, you know, what advice would you give someone as their, you know, Roz went through it as well. Right? I mean, he went, he went to the dance for a year and so then it's gone.
And so what, what do, what would you talk about with someone as you're talking with them and they say, well, What advice would you give on that identity side of
[00:33:33] Darrell: things? You know, on the identity side of things, it, it is tough and, and that's something I definitely went through for sure. Was the fact of, okay, I'm, I'm no longer a starting quarterback.
I'm no longer a you know, I'm no longer a quote unquote football player training, you know, to go somewhere, to try to get a chance or get a shot. You know, it's, it's tough. It's, it's hard to navigate. If there was one thing that, you know, I kind of, I kind of look back on and, and think about is, you [00:34:00] know, don't, don't take yourself too seriously.
You know, don't think you are, you know, this, this, you know, a person that, that life can't happen to, you know, life is gonna get you one way or another. And there's, there's something to be said, you know, about, you know, kind of taking your blessings and, and understanding, you know, Where good things have happened, where bad things have happened and you know, kind of, kind of enjoying the journey, you know, or, or when it's at its end, being able to look back and, you know, Hey, I, I was able to accomplish a lot of great things in life, and I think that's the one thing guys lose not, not necessarily lose, but they kind of forget about you know, is the amount of accomplishments that.
You know, gain throughout that entire time, all the way up until the point of it ending because the ultimate goal is to obviously play professionally and play in the NFL. And you know, when that doesn't happen, you know, a lot of [00:35:00] guys are, oh, mission failed and my life was nothing and my life was not, you know, it wasn't worth it.
I, you know, I spent this amount of years in my life trying to make it to somewhere where I didn't make. Instead of, you know, being able to look back and go, okay, well, wait a minute. I, I was actually able to accomplish some great things. I was actually able to have a great effect on people's lives that were close to me.
You know, it's always, it's always nice. You know, when you get a text from, you know, an old teammate or an old coach or an old recruiting coordinator, or somebody that liked you so much, that they just wanted to see how you're doing. You know, being able to have that looking back and being able to see that I had an impact on somebody like that, where I was a good person in the building, that they liked me enough to reach out two and a half years later without any type of conversation and just saying, Hey, how are you doing?
You know, I hope everything's good for you. You know, Hey, I just wanna let you know, like, I really do thank [00:36:00] you, you know, for the way, you know, for the person that you are and the way that you were here. And you know, that was one thing that was, was kind of cool looking back. And kind of the cool thing about social media, even though there's a lot of, there's a lot of bad things about it.
You know, the good thing about it is the ability to be able to connect with people you would never connect with in your entire life. And you know, sometimes being able to hear those stories and see those stories and read those stories about, you know, how you made someone feel, or, you know, the things you were able to The passion, you were able to give somebody during your time there and stuff like that and how they look at you as you know, Hey, I just want to thank you for all the, for all the time that you put in and and stuff like that.
So it's always, you know, it's always nice that, you know, there are people out there in the world that do thank you for, you know, the things that you've done and, and stuff like that. So I think just understanding that, you know, you do have an impact on people and sometimes it's nice to just look back and realize, okay, You know, this may not be [00:37:00] a feel good moment right now, but look at all these feel good moments that I was able to create during my time, my time there.
[00:37:07] Phil: Yeah, no. And what I hear you saying there, and this is what I would say for coaches to hear in that, which I think is the brilliant point out of that, which is the idea of the, really the journey is the destination. The idea that enjoy the journey to. Even you saying you played in college, you played in D one.
And what did you say your favorite time plan was high school with your buddies? Like as high school quarterbacks as high school players, don't miss the moment. Don't miss the journey you are experiencing. Amazing, awesome things. And I, I, I feel like I'm saying this during COVID where a lot of people aren't playing right now, so it might frustrate them more because we are missing a lot going on right now.
But I think that there are those moments that you will miss if all you're doing is looking to the future. And I think that goes to anything we're doing. Outside of sports in [00:38:00] sports, everything, right. Don't miss the opportunities. Don't miss the amazing things that are happening in the moment that you are able to enjoy.
And so that, I mean, that's what I heard. I don't wanna put words into your mouth. Yeah.
[00:38:11] Darrell: That's what I heard. One, 100, 110%. And, and it's really easy nowadays, especially with, with social media you know, to look towards the future or look for something that you don't have, you know what I mean? Mm-hmm, , it, it's very easy to do that to do that now.
So. You know, it's, it's just, you just gotta be reminded. Remember where you're at enjoy this moment because these moments don't last forever. They just don't.
[00:38:37] Coach Roz: Well, what I, what I heard you say, Darrell is whether it's social media or whatever relationships and that kind of brings us to. Your dad and I have got over a 40 year relationships.
I was in his wedding. I remember the day, I remember the day that you were born so he and I, you know, he and I have a relationship through, you know, the [00:39:00] most wonderful game that God put on the face of the earth. And and that, that to me, looking back on it, you know, I can't remember who we beat and who we didn't.
You know, those things fade, but the relationships through the game are, are unbelievable. Darrell. We could talk with you, I particularly with you for hours and I hope you'll. I hope you'll come back. I know Phil is totally overwhelmed that he's getting to sit with two quarterbacks. It's all spiritual experience for him. So good to talk to you. We are so proud of you. I just all your accomplishments. It's just it's just fun to see all of all of the great things that are happening to you.
So, best of luck to you tell the old man that I said, Hey, and I will be there
[00:39:44] Darrell: soon. Phil
[00:39:45] Phil: wrap us up. Yeah. Thanks a lot. Darrell. It's this was, this was fantastic. Lots of, lots of great hopefully folks out there. I mean, if, whether you coach your kids or not, I know that you. There's just a lot of really good advice in this, in this episode.
So, you know, again, thanks again, [00:40:00] Darrell. It's great to get to know you a little bit here. And I hope our audience feels the same way. And folks, you know, as we talk about every week this, this. Podcast is not just to have some conversations. This podcast is to help you to help your kids, that you are working with to be able to develop them, develop their character, develop their integrity, develop them as leaders, develop them as human beings.
And you have such an amazing, amazing privilege to be able to build into your, the, the kids that are in your midst. And so, you know, if this is helping you share it with others, To help, you know, to hopefully be able to help them as well. Anyone that you think can, can benefit from this podcast, share it with them.
Also follow us on on social media. It's just something that, as we know, as Darrell talked about, it helps get it out there. Right. And read the podcast. Subscribe, if you haven't done so already, but most importantly, take what you're. In this podcast and use it to help you to help those children [00:41:00] in your midst to be better in everything that they do.
Folks, as I talked about last week, this interview, as an example, why I just did not want these episodes. Of the coaching character podcast to just sit in Dropbox somewhere and never be heard by people because there is so much good stuff in them. There's these great lessons that I knew that I loved learning, and I knew you would enjoy learning them as well. And so I do hope that you.
Engage the conversation that you share this with other people. You share the past how soccer explains leadership episodes. If you want to go back and listen to all those past episodes of this summer. Uh, those that you've missed some you want to listen to, again, I encourage you to do that as well. In addition to.
You know, don't skip over these coaching character episodes, just because it says a different title of a podcast. I wouldn't share with you if I didn't think you could learn. And that's why we are sharing. These with you, they have similar principles that we are [00:42:00] talking about in how soccer explains leadership.
Even though it isn't. The real football is this other American football thing that we're talking about. We can learn from that sport as well. So I hope that you did learn from that today. And you've also learned from the other episodes we've shared. This summer, there's a few more that we have before. We're going to be kicking off the next season of how soccer explains leadership, which will likely be in late August, early September. Not going to make any promises about the exact date, because I'm not sure we want to make sure it's ready with great content before we get it out there.
So until then, remember that you can check out. All the past episodes. As I just mentioned, you can check out warriorwaysoccer.com. To read about and find out about what Marcy and Paul are doing with that great ministry. You can check out coachingthebiggergame.com to see what. Christian DeVries and I are doing, you can go to Providenceworld.com to see the work that I do with orphan and vulnerable children around the world, [00:43:00] using sport to connect with them.
And, you know what folks, I just, I just hope that you're taking what you're learning. From this show and you're using it to help you be a better leader, a better coach, a better parent. A better spouse. And you're continually reminding yourself that soccer does explain life and leadership. Thanks a lot. Have a great week.
In Episode 62, we are capping off 2021 and ringing in 2022 with 20 great leadership lessons (plus a couple bonus nuggets) from our interviews over the past year. There is so much more wisdom in the full interviews, which …