In Episode 90 and other episodes this summer, we are taking a break from our normal programming to share with you some unreleased episodes from the Coaching Character Podcast, which Phil recorded with Coach Roz, who played football for the Oakland...
In Episode 90 and other episodes this summer, we are taking a break from our normal programming to share with you some unreleased episodes from the Coaching Character Podcast, which Phil recorded with Coach Roz, who played football for the Oakland Raiders and San Diego State, and now runs The Playmakers, which works with at-risk and developmentally different children. This is great content that we wanted to ensure got the airtime it deserves. In this episode, Coach Roz and Phil talk about the lessons learned from their conversation with Coach Sauers (from last week’s episode), intentionally incorporating integrity and character coaching into coaching (and life), why we need to incorporate fun into youth sports, and ways we can do all of these things. One thing they discuss that you don’t want to miss is why it is a great idea to invite your players (and anyone else you lead) to imitate you in front of you and your team.
Resources and Links from this Episode
Phil: Welcome back to how soccer explains leadership. I'm Phil dark, your host and Paul Jobson. And I love coming at you every week with just incredible content. And hopefully you think it's incredible as well. Thank you for being a part of the conversation. If this is your first time listening to the podcast, this isn't our normal show.
This isn't our normal episode for us this summer, Paul and I are taking a little break to spend some more time with our families and get some of the other things done that. We do. And so we decided to do something a little different. We are releasing the lost episodes of the coaching character podcast that I was able to record with coach Roz. He used to play for the Oakland Raiders in San Diego state. He now runs.
The Playmakers organization, which is doing some great work with at-risk kids and developmentally different children. And I encourage you to check out the playmakers.org to see all the work that they're doing. [00:01:00] I also encourage you to subscribe to this podcast. Uh, if you haven't done so already, so that you'll get every episode when we start releasing some new episodes and you can go back to all the other episodes that we've made. I think we're now on episode 90. We have a lot of great Content with some incredible people. So, you know, I just wanted to, introduce this episode where coach Roz and I just talk about the episode that we released last week, an interview we did with coach Sauers. He is a youth.
Football and that's American football. Coach in Tracy, California, he's doing some great things, but we just talk about some of the things we talk about that in episode. You're going to hear about how we can intentionally include character and integrity in our practices as coaches we can. You're going to hear about.
Why it's important to have fun and laugh. In our practices and our, in our, in our teams. And one way that you might be able to make that happen in a way that teaches. Players a lot and teaches you as a coach and as a leader, [00:02:00] a lot about yourself. So that's the com this episode without more from me.
Here's coaching character. Podcast. Lost episode
[00:02:10] Coach Roz: Welcome to another episode of coaching character. I'm Coach Roz with Phil Darke and Phil let's kick this thing
[00:02:16] Phil: off. Yeah, I'm really excited again. You know, I, I keep saying I'm excited when I started these shows, cuz I am, I, I like the, the, the content is just so good. The coach SAS again, a guy that you've known for a long time, the guy that I just.
On that interview, just like Harrison, I met on that interview and, and the great thing is, is these men are clearly men that love what they're doing and that's something that shines through. And I think it's something that we're gonna get into a bit here too today. Just the ideas that he brought up in that.
In that conversation and folks again, if you didn't, if you didn't hear that conversation, go back before you listen to Roz. And I talk though, in this episode, go back and listen to the last episode, because this is something that if you're listening to this, it's likely that you're a [00:03:00] coach or you're a parent, or you're a player who, who cares about these things and cares about character and integrity.
And you know what? These are, these principles that Coach Sauers, that Harrison, that Roz and I have been talking about you know, they're little nuggets, but they're gonna go a long way in your coaching and, and really in your family and your life.
[00:03:18] Coach Roz: Well, you know, when we, when we started this Phil, we had committed that we were gonna deliver something that was content and not just.
Just, you know, us talking back and forth and with the people that we have had on I've been, I've been really encouraged about the content that they are, that they're giving that we can drill into at a deeper level. So our formats kind of is becoming, we have a. A guest on that we, that we let go.
And then you and I drill into at the following episode a little bit deeper, and you've gotten to thank you for letting me kind of go first in that our first guests have been some football guys that we're learning a great deal from, but I [00:04:00] know your library of people in the soccer community. I I'm excited.
About getting to meet. I know you interviewed with your podcast of how soccer coaches, leadership the Baylor coach, and I, I'm excited to get to meet some of your network yeah. And learn from them. So I just think up to this point, it's been a great, great
[00:04:19] Phil: exchange. Yeah, absolutely. And just, just for clarification, it is how soccer explains leadership, but that's okay.
That is another podcast that If you're listening to this, you'll probably like that one too. You know, even if you're not a soccer person, those are just principles. Really how I explain it to people is coaching character. This podcast, what we're trying to do is in what hopefully we're doing so far is we're really bringing the leadership principles that exist out there to your coaching, to the game.
So we're bringing leadership, organizational leadership, organizational health, to the. And to your practices so that you can have actual tidbits of information, nuggets of information, to be able to take to the practice field directly to there. What we're trying to do with how [00:05:00] soccer explains leadership really is take the principles from the game to your leadership, to the organization, to your family, to, you know, culture and.
I love how we kind of have them complementing each other. And like you said, those, those people that are gonna be on that show, a lot of them will be guests on this show as well. Because again, they can talk about the other direction, which is kind of cool. And we're doing a little bit of both on both shows, but because I think these principles are critical again, not just for the Xes and not just for the game.
That's really the point of this whole podcast is these principles. Go to every area of life. And if we're not coaching that, if we're not teaching that in the midst of these conversations, in the midst of our coaching if all we're doing is Xs and OS we're missing, I think probably most of what we're supposed to be doing as
[00:05:44] Coach Roz: coaches, right.
Or if what we're doing is teaching or talking about theory that a, that a youth coach goes well, that might be wonderful at Baylor, but I coach. A bunch of eight year old kids twice a week. Right. So, so what [00:06:00] I like is, is that as I'm listening, I go, oh wow. I can, I can take that and I can take it right to the practice field.
Yeah. And I can start on that
[00:06:08] Phil: immediately. Yep. Well, hopefully we'll get I've talked with coach jobs at Baylor, who you talking about? His wife actually coaches their eight year old and they're 11 year old, then their four year. So she, and, and he was saying she needs to get on your coaching character show cuz she's using the principles.
We use a Baylor with these little kids, right. And it's the same principles. It's, there's nothing different when you're talking about coaching character and quite frankly, there's nothing different. I, I watched Manchester United train. That's a soccer team for you folks out there who are, who are American football fans.
I watched them train and they were doing the same drills that I used, my, my high school kids who, the same drills that I used with when we did eight year old training. There's not much different you can do with the fundamentals. Yeah. Right. And there's fundamentals of character and there's fundamentals of integrity and there's fundamentals of life that we have the.
Privilege and the pleasure and the opportunity to be able to coach into our kids. It's incredible. [00:07:00] So let's get, you know, let's get to the actual interview that we were able to do with coach Sauers, which again, thank you, coach Sauers for being a part of this show, but you know, what were some of the things that you wanna mine a little bit more
[00:07:11] Coach Roz: today?
Well, J just. Just to rewind. Coach SAS is a youth coach who I've known for a bunch of years since he was a young young man who is now one of the coaches for the Tracy Buccaneers over in the bay area. And there was so much that I genuinely gleaned from him. But I think one of the things that jumps out at me is his degree.
Preparation coach is an extremely, extremely prepared individual. He has a practice plan, and I don't think this makes any difference. What sport you're coaching coach shows up with a written practice plan, where he has everything scripted literally to the minute he is committed. To maximizing the [00:08:00] time that he gets with those kids on the field, whether that's two days a week or five days a week, but his degree of preparation, when, when I go observe practices around the country, I see so many coaches.
Just winging it. Mm-hmm . So that, that was the first thing that I gleaned or one of the things that I gleaned from him.
[00:08:22] Phil: Yeah. No. And I think that that is something that whether, you know, we're talking, this is the coaching character podcast, right? This isn't the coaching XO OS podcast. This isn't the how to coach no, you know, offensive lineman podcast or running back.
This is coaching character. And, and I think a lot of times what coaches do is they prepare the Xs and OS part. But they wing the character and integrity and leadership part. And they're not preparing themselves either. They're not reading themselves. They're not learning. I mean, something coach Sauers said at the end of that interview, which was almost that like in the, Hey, what else do you have to, he says, we gotta be continually learning.
Right. That's actually, I did another interview for how soccer explains the leadership to, [00:09:00]and, and that was some things he talked about. There leaders are learners. Yep. Right. It used to be leaders are readers, but I think now people aren't reading as much and they're learning with all these other things that we have.
There's absolutely. No, excuse. For leaders and coaches to not be learning today. Absolutely zero. If you're not a lead, even if you're a literate, you can watch YouTube videos, you can listen to stuff. And hopefully you're not illiterate if you're coaching, but there's zero. Excuse. Oh. To be learning. And I will say that I've seen so many coaches that go out there and they are, they are not only not preparing the character integrity site.
They're not doing it at all, but the ones that are doing it and winging it that can actually potentially do more damage. Because you're not yourself. As we talked about, you need to be living it out yourself as coach Sauers talked about, as we've talked about, you need to be not only self-aware, you need to be building yourself up in, in who you are so that your players will see it.
And then [00:10:00] that's part of the preparation on the character part is you making sure that you are healthy yourself. You are learning this yourself. You are living it out yourself. So if your coach, if your players go and ask, you know, if they go see your wife and how you treat your wife, It better be consistent with what you're telling them.
If they see you working with your kids, you better be consistent with what you're telling them. And that is the preparation part of that is the preparation for what you're doing in the, in the field. And then the way you're coaching them and the way you're modeling it for them will be what you're saying.
But then there's also the side of actually incorporating these character tips, these character lessons into your practice, which talk a little bit about that because you've written a book about it. Right? So talk about ways to be prepared for the coaching character part and the actual incorporating it into your
[00:10:54] Coach Roz: practices.
Well, if, if I'm answering your question back to coach Sauers, coach [00:11:00] is. Is very, very detailed in his practice plan. And what, what we believe is that if you're detailed in your practice plan, it leaves more room in your, in the time that you've got with those kids and families to coach and develop what is most important.
And that is character. It's not having a detailed practice plan so that you get. 15 more penalty kicks. If you're coaching soccer or you get 20 more O line reps, if you're coaching football, but it's having your, your plan organized in a manner that you are efficient. And now you've got five or 10 minutes at the practice at the end of the practice to talk about character and to give them a character.
That's the, to me, that's the importance of of, of a, of a detailed practice plan to rewind on something that you said, you know, Phil, [00:12:00] you speak to coaches and people all over the country. Now we coaches in general, we've got healthy egos. And how many times have you, have you talked or interacted or been speaking to a coach?
And he says, well, I've got 10 years experience. You spend a short period of time with them and you realize they don't have 10 years of experience. They have one year, 10 times. . Yeah. And, and is there a difference? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, because you. Phil are extremely, extremely experienced in many different subjects, but you are a lover of learning.
You are a coach that gets fascinated with learning something new and you are at a coaching level. Where you probably could put your resume out in front of a lot of different people yet you love learning something new. Mm-hmm, something new a, a, a, a, a refreshing of the basics. So, so [00:13:00] back to coach Sauers organizing your practice plan, first of all, the kids deserve it, you know, you and I love what we know are two sacred games to show.
Minimally prepared and saying, well, it's just youth football. I I'm. It's good. No, it's not. We, if, if we're going to make a life impact difference with these kids and families, then by gosh, we have to hold what we do in high esteem. We have to be prepared. We have to know what we're gonna deliver with character.
And I'm obviously well upon my soapbox right now. Any, did I answer the question in there
[00:13:36] Phil: anywhere? I, I dunno, but what you said was good. I, I think, you know, I, I, I think that the, the thing I want to. Highlight there, what you said, and, you know, you can get Roz's books, you can read the actual, the actual tips for the character and, and he actually has in their practice plans.
The one he wrote with Harrison, I forget the title of [00:14:00] it. You can tell me the title of it, maybe, but the idea that I think is critical is whatever you're doing and, you know, practices. Go into that, whatever you're doing, obviously, if you're listening to this and your coach, but for this podcast, we put together an outline, right?
We don't just come into it and wing it. Because that, because you're spending your time on the other end of this, and you're listening to us, we have a responsibility to you to actually have a plan, stick to it. And obviously with a podcast, you have informality as you do in a practice, right? You have flexibility.
You're going to adapt to situations. If different things happen, if a player yells at you and calls you. Whatever name, you need to take a step off and you gotta, you know, tell your other coaches, Hey, you take care of this right now. I gotta take care of this issue, right? If there's a really good thing that happens, you wanna be able to have that flexibility to say, Hey, great job.
That was amazing. And to be able to celebrate that, right? So within the structure, there's flexibility, but as they say, you know, in order to [00:15:00] have true freedom, you need to have structure. And I think the same goes for our practices. So to be able to have the practices scheduled and you owe it to you owe that to your players, right?
They, they. Taken their time to be able to come and play. They've chosen to be there. They've chosen to be on that. And you have committed to them that you are going to, and you've essentially promised them informally or formally that you are going to take the time to, to plan a practice that will be able to teach them lessons about the game.
And, you know, and then again, as we've been saying with this, with this podcast, if you are a coach that simply just says, okay, I'm teaching him lessons about the game. End of story. That I'm. You're missing out, like you're missing out. Yeah. On what I think and what Sauers talked about and what you've talked about and what Harrison talked about.
Probably the most by far important part about coaching, whatever level you're coaching at is to help to develop these men and women in, or these, these [00:16:00] boys and girls into men and women mm-hmm . And that is just as you, I mean, you said sacred, it's a sacred responsibility. It's a sacred privilege that we have.
And so, but in order, the only way we're gonna get there. Is by having a plan is by having a structure. Now I'm fortunate to coach with a coach who in the, in the high school team that I coach he's a lot more structured than I am. I'm not the most structured guy in the world, but he comes with a tructure and I know he's gonna have a structure, but then I coach the keepers and I know that I have.
I ask him, how long do I have, right. And he tells me, and so I wanna make sure to have enough structure in that time, but I also leave time. Like you said, for the conversations about the last game for the conversations about the game itself, for the conversations about life and checking in on them, seeing how they're doing.
Because I think that's critical to, to know. And even when I do trainings and private trainings with the, you know, with kids and I don't do too much of it because just time and, but I, I choose certain players. I know they really wanna go to the next level and I [00:17:00] can really build into them and pour into them.
And I purposefully spend at least, you know, 10% of the time with, 'em just catching up with them, seeing how they're doing, talking to 'em about the game, teaching them in different parts about life. And that's something that again is critical. So I think that, but again, it's intentionality. I think the word really that keeps coming back into my head is intentionality and, and.
Being able to be intentional with the responsibility that we have.
[00:17:25] Coach Roz: Well, you, you touched on something that, that also supports what Sauers says, and that is through, you know, you said in your role as a soccer coach, you're at the assistant coach level. You have a, you have a, a head coach mm-hmm that organizes and structures things, but your keeper category is structured.
So that you've, if I heard you correctly, you've built in time that you can interact with these kids and dig in to some degree [00:18:00] what's going on at home. How, how many times as a coach, Phil, have you heard? Mom and dad are fighting at home. Mom and dad may have separated. I, my, my, my sibling is just the life things that happen.
Mm-hmm that, that if you've got time and sensitivity built into what you're doing now, you can take that thread that that kid gave you, and you can pour into them at a level that. Is what makes a difference. Sauers talks about, about allocating time, where he can ask them, Hey, how's your day going at school?
What's going on? But digging in at a deeper level to, to me, that is the, that those are the things that when we're interviewing that kid that is now an adult and they say, gosh, coach dark. Coach [00:19:00]dark knew about my family. He knew I could talk with him. He, he was, he was like a dad to me. Or, or he played this role in my life.
That's far beyond what you taught them as a
[00:19:11] Phil: keeper, right? Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, like we've talked about most of these kids, aren't gonna go on. Yeah to play pro they're, most of 'em are gonna go on to play college. They're gonna they're, you know, I I've been fortunate to coach, you know, kids who are going on to play college, cuz they're great players.
So I've been able to, I've been fortunate to be able to do that. And a couple of them may go pro, but it's not likely very unlikely. Especially as a keeper coach, cuz there's only one starting keeper on every, any team. So to know that, that, but also if they do go to college, That's still a great opportunity to pour into them, to be able to play at that next level.
And, and so I'm also fortunate to have a wife who played division one college. And so she's able to come in and speak truth into these, especially since I coach girls to be able to bring them home and be able to incorporate my family into my coaching as well. So [00:20:00] those are all things that when you see it as bigger than the game, which I think is what we're talking about here.
Then it changes really your entire perspective on everything. Right. And I think that goes to another thing that we talked about with Sauers was really that perspective. Right. You know, cuz we were talking about embezzlement, we're talking about money, we're talking about winning at all costs. We're talking about all these other things.
That's really where it's perspective for me. When I look at it, I talk to my kids and you know, we're big Manchester, United fans in our house when the game's on several of us are watching the game at any time or we'll watch it. On demand or whatever, but at the end of that game, whether they win, lose, or draw, we go on with life and you know, what the players do too, right?
Yeah. Is it, are they bummed? Yeah. Are, you know, if they lost, are they bummed? If they, you know, didn't win the championship or they do win the championship, are they excited? Yes. What happens if they win the championship? They win. Yeah. If they're players, they make more money, they get a bonus. At the end of the day, they go home, they go to their wife or their kids, or they go home to [00:21:00] their apartment or whatever, and they.
and when, when the sport's over they're human beings, that ha that are living in the world. And if all they do is rest on their laurels of sports, that's a pretty miserable existence in my opinion. Yeah.
[00:21:13] Coach Roz: Well, and when it comes to an end you have a pretty one dimensional life. yeah. You and, and, you know, and, and there's a, there's a whole series of tragedies that can happen with that.
You, you touched on something that, that will. Again, we'll just touch on it. When we were talking with Sauers, we are, we were, we address. The fact, the ugly underbelly of youth sports today, embezzlement and youth sports abuse of officials today Sauers was talking about comp baseball teams, where people were, where families are paying up to $5,000 to compete at a youth level.
Not, not that that's a bad thing in itself, but it just adds to the pressure and it adds to the [00:22:00]complexity of what we do. And, and, and, and the point being you're talking about perspective. We are coaching kids that we get to influence two to four days a week for a certain number of months during the year.
How are we going to maximize the impact that we have in those families? How are we going to help a kid transition through a dysfunctional family. Phil you coach, you coach a girl's soccer team and an affluent high school in Sacramento. I'm gonna pick a number and say it's 20 to 25 kids. Are all of those families functional and, and intact, or are there, or are there tragedies and circumstances that, that you can be.
A healing part
[00:22:52] Phil: of, yeah, absolutely. I mean, there's fatherless kids, there's kids that are in broken families. There's kids that have lost parents. There's kids that have, [00:23:00] that are, that have had, you know, they've been kicked out. They, they missed games cuz they had, they were drinking at a football game or they're doing the other, there's so many different issues and I've, I mean, that's just the last couple years.
And we're. The suburbs of, you know, the bubble of bubbles. I mean, Folsom, California, it's suburbia USA. You, you know, there's all kinds of these pockets of suburbs around the country that wherever you are, I've lived in several of them. And it feels like the same community. So if you're wherever you are around the country, you know, this community it just is a different city name, but it's theoretically the, you know, it's upper middle, upper middle
So it's theoretically like you. The utopia of America, right. But it's not, there's so much brokenness. My, you know, my day job is, is running a nonprofit that we, we are helping organizations around the world that work with orphan and vulnerable children. And. Helping to hopefully strengthen families and children around the world.
So, you know, we see the brokenness every single day, [00:24:00] like right in our face. And I go and coach this team. And part of the reason I do is I'm able to feed into this and hopefully strengthen the lives of these children and their families. And, and that's something that I, again, I take that responsibility very, very seriously.
And, and you go, you were talking about the, the youth sports and the, the money. I mean the 5,000 is just the start. That's just that's before travel, right? I mean, in soccer, it's the same, it's the ECNL levels. They, they say estimate between seven and $8,000. And then plus the travel, if you want to go with them and.
And that's the other thing is 12, 13 year old kids are going on these trips without their parents. They're going with chaperones, cuz they quote, want to prepare them for college. And I'm like, what? what are you talking about? Like this is crazy talk. Yep. But they have to justify the money. So not only do you have to practice four or five nights a week.
So you don't have family dinners anymore, which is more breakdown of family. You're go having to go to these tournaments that are often [00:25:00] across the country and not with your family, cuz you're traveling with your team and, and they're saying, well again, that's preparing you for X. And I'm like, if we look at stats, the things that will will help to ensure that you will be a functional adult, are family dinners.
That is one of the, the key things. Yep. At least a couple a week. Yep. And we can't do it. Yep. I look at, I just think in my own, my own home and we're relatively functional. We haven't had a family. Our kids even said, I love that. My kids said it. We haven't had a family dinner for a while. Because of practice because the practice schedule with COVID has been crazy.
Sure. But I, I, I loved daylight savings ending because we can have more family dinners.
[00:25:50] Coach Roz: Yeah. I I'm gonna I'm I'm gonna go down a rabbit trail for a minute. I have a daughter that, that's what we do. I have a daughter that played her soccer at Notre Dame college in, in [00:26:00] Cleveland. And she is an athlete.
And, and a warrior. And the other day she was showing me some poetry that she has written. I call her my, my warrior poet mm-hmm and and she was showing me some poetry that she wrote. And one of the first ones that she wanted me to see was something that was called breakfast. Now we kind take that for granted, but breakfast in our house is kind of a.
Tradition family sacred event that I had no idea, no idea. You know, you were talking. Dinner. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm taking for granted. Oh, every now and then I get up and rumble around and cook some breakfast. Well, it was important enough to her that she's written about it. Yeah. So just your point, your point of meals and what doesn't happen at the competitive level doesn't make comp sports, an evil thing.
No, my kids all play. Yeah, exactly. But it's just the, the, the, the vacuum that we get pulled into. Well, again, it [00:27:00] goes to
[00:27:00] Phil: perspective. If your perspective is sport is everything. Then sport becomes everything. Yep. If your perspective is there's a whole lot more to life than sport, then, I mean, my family, when my, my oldest daughter who's now playing in college when she was 13 years old, 12 or 13, I can't remember exactly.
We decided as a family, we're gonna take a sabbatical year. We took a year off of all, everything I got outta my board of director's positions, anything that wasn't my work, which I needed to do obviously was cut off. Right. And the people thought we were nuts. And I said, it's what we gotta do. It's perspective.
It's gonna show my kids that not everything is about sports. What an amazing year. What an amazing year for all of 'em and you know what everyone who said our kids would never be able to make up that year. My wife and I, who both played at the college level, said, that's a lot of garbage and they'll be just fine.
And you know what they were and they [00:28:00] are, and I think they're much, much healthier human beings for it. And, oh man, it was, you couldn't imagine the grief we got from people though.
[00:28:08] Coach Roz: Oh, I would imagine. I would imagine. So back to Sauers for just a moment. We asked him a question and, and it's been interesting in we've now done two interviews one with Harrison Phillips, who again is a Buffalo bill.
So obviously he's played football at every level, from the NFL on down to, we just interviewed Sauers who played college football on down. And the question that we've asked both of them is when was it most fun? and I, I wasn't surprised, but I found it interesting that they did not, they did not answer the question with, at the highest level I play.
They answered one Harrison's answer was youth football and Sauers' answer was high school football. And then they immediately began an explanation [00:29:00] of the fun that they had in the game. So the question that I have for you, Phil is you are a coach. I'm assuming that you agree that it has to be fun, but how do you incorporate fun?
Let's, let's play back and forth a little bit. How do you incorporate fun into your sport?
[00:29:25] Phil: Yeah, I mean, I think it's gotta be at the core of what you do and why you do it. I think you need to yourself kind of choose joy in your life. Right. And what that, what that looks like. I, I will say too. It's interesting to me to see today.
It's easier for me cuz I'm a high school soccer coach and with soccer, very little recruiting. If any goes on at the high school soccer level at the high school, it goes on in the clubs, almost all the recruiting is done in the clubs. So for high school soccer, it's really their like outlet to have fun again in the game.
And I try to, you know, and I. [00:30:00] We have that conversation with our head coach all the time. Like this is a lot of these players are just like, let's just go have a good time in high school soccer, cuz they can come and it's just let loose and play the game that they loved again. And I see that and I, our players last year, you know, at the end of the season, they were crying because they were so bummed that the season was over because they were having so much fun again.
And I think a lot of it goes to the game itself. Yes. But what are we doing outside the game? Are we hanging out together? Are we playing? Are we going bowling together? Are we going miniature golfing? Are we hanging out at a movie? You know, at someone's house, are we having dinner together and just joking around and, and goofing around together?
And we did that a lot with our team. I mean, the coaches, we kind of sat off to the side. We weren't like trying to hang out as high schoolers again. Sure. But I remember my high school. If I go back, when did I, what high, what teams did I love the most? They were my high school teams too. And so I don't know that it's.
You then, you know, you have beach balls at practice. It's I mean, that's not what we're talking about. We're not talking about bringing [00:31:00] up the drive-in movie screen at a, at practice, but during practice, how can you foster. Team camaraderie as much as possible, you know? I know my kids, like their club teams, they'll do like, they'll bring out Otter pops every so often.
They'll have music at the practices. They'll keep it, you know, loose in that way. But again, that doesn't, that's not what makes it fun because that's forcing it. What makes it fun? In my opinion is fostering relationship is fostering them to become they're my best buds, because that's honestly, when it lost fun for me in college is when the players, I looked around the team.
And again, I'm a very people focused person, but I looked around the team and I was like, these aren't guys, I necessarily want to hang out with all the time. And I struggled to see how that was something I was going to enjoy. And have it be something that now, again, In life, you're not necessarily gonna have jobs that you're always gonna love everyone you work with, but when it comes to the, the [00:32:00] sport, again, if you're not going pro you look at it and go, okay, are these people that I'm gonna love doing life with?
and then that's how I would say I incorporate front as a coach is I try to foster those types of relationships on the team, knowing that not everyone's gonna be best buds, but when you're on this team, how can you as a team, see it as one unit. And that will make it a lot more fun when you're on the same page, kind of going back to the mission, vision values conversation that we had the last time too, to have that common vision.
Then you can incorporate into that. How can we be a healthier, fun, more fun team?
[00:32:37] Coach Roz: I two things come to mind when I ask you that question, one is I will ask a coach, this question regularly. How many pizzas have you bought this year? And to me, I had a coach I had a coach that, that absolutely floored him in going, I'm trying to develop a relationships relationship with my kids, my players, [00:33:00] and I'm going.
Coach that's done over a pepperoni pizza. Yep. Absolutely. I mean,
[00:33:05] Phil: how many, so we did it over Chick-fil-A last year, but you know, whatever. Yeah.
[00:33:09] Coach Roz: Okay. So, so that one in, in you're saying in developing a culture of fun, but let me drill into the question just a little bit deeper. And I have not seen you coach on the field.
[00:33:23] Phil: It's quite a spectacle. I
[00:33:25] Coach Roz: will tell you that right now. I'll bet. It's unbelievable. Just . Yeah.
[00:33:29] Phil: Right. Players might not agree with that, but I mean, in my head, but
[00:33:32] Coach Roz: here here's the question that, that I don't truly know the answer to do your players get to see a fun side of coach Phil. Is there ever a case where you can laugh at yourself or set up a scenario where, where.
They get to laugh at you a little bit or laugh with you a little bit or is there all the time?
[00:33:53] Phil: Okay. All the time. Yeah. I mean now I think in, in our, on our team as an assistant coach and I actually [00:34:00] talk to the players about this as an assistant coach, I get to be the fun coach. Okay. You, you, right. You know what I'm saying?
Like, and I tell them that, like I say, if I was a head coach, I'd, I'd have a different role and a different responsibility as the assistant coach. It's not like I'm goofball class clown. No, but I can be a D. Role. Right. And so that is the fun, it's almost a good cop, bad cop sometimes. But I also understand with the head coach, he wants to have that too.
And he, when appropriate is working on and trying, and he's, again, going back to the personalities, he's very task focused and we know that we're opposite personalities. Mm-hmm and so we actually compliment each other very well. And so he, he has. Fun. And he jokes around in his way, but it's a much drier sense of humor.
So Rick, if you're listening to this, you know, I, I hope you agree with this, but I'm able to kind of have that lighter side. That's one of your roles because I'm the assistant coach. Yeah. And I can do that and I love it. I love that part of it. I love the relationship side of things and it has brought a totally different dynamic to our [00:35:00] team.
And so, but we laugh all the time. I mean, and I, I, you know, I'll make little jokes and, but you have to be careful too. Sure. You don't wanna undermine the head coach. Right. So it's that fine line of. It. Fun laughing together, but not like undermining the authority of head coach and saying, oh, you don't really need to listen to that either.
You know, but to, to, to, when something is funny, draw it out and allow him to laugh. Yeah. Don't be like, have this like tense. We don't want, you know, we're serious out here cause we're playing soccer, you know? No, if someone like when I was warming up and I slipped because I didn't have cleats on and I took a shot.
Fell on my butt. We laugh about it. And they're all like, ah, look at coach Phil. You know, you can't even whatev and that's fun. And I laugh at myself and because again, that's critical. I mean, that's, again, that's just life. Like we do a lot of things that you should be laughing at. And I definitely do a lot of things, usually laughing at me about, and, and if we can't do that, then we're missing out on life.
I mean, in my opinion, I,
[00:35:56] Coach Roz: I learned something and it was quite by accident. And, and hopefully, [00:36:00] maybe this is maybe this is one of these little takeaways for, for today's episode. I found now in most of. Situations I'm a head coach. But I don't think it makes any difference. I will set something up in a meeting where the players get an opportunity to imitate coach Roz or to imitate coach.
Yeah. Phil. Yeah. and what a learning. Oh, absolutely. I got now here's what you have to understand. They're doing that anyway when you're not around. Yes, of course. Of course. So you give them an opportunity to imitate you. Oh my gosh. What you can learn yeah. About yourself, right? It and, and, and they have a blast with it.
Absolutely. Yeah. They have a blast,
[00:36:48] Phil: so, no, that's fantastic. And I think that the principle there for me is the idea that as a leader, To become vulnerable with your team. Right. They know you're messed up. [00:37:00] they know how you're messed up. They know your faults, they know the negative qualities about you when you own them.
And you're open with them that you know them too. Oh my gosh. That just changes. Everything really does. And it allows them to see that you're self aware that they know that, you know, so. And I mean, what a great way to do that. And, and like you said, they do it anyway. Oh yeah. My kids are my kids, my excuse, my kids, my team at, I don't want you confuse it with my five kids at home, which is almost a soccer team, but the, their, they do those impressions, like.
I don't ask. I don't have to ask them to again, cuz we have that camaraderie on our team where they're imitating me and they're imitating Rick and they're and it's, it's a blast. And, and I, I love it. I mean, I think it's cuz what it shows is two things. One, it shows that they're comfortable with you, but two, it shows they're listening and they're watching.
right. Because if they couldn't do an impression, then they're not listening and watching. Yeah. But if they can do an impression, not only, [00:38:00] well, usually what happens is they're, they're doing an impression of the words that you're saying. Yes. But also the mannerisms that you're doing it. And they'll repeat back the.
The mantras that you are saying that you really want them to know and understand, cuz you're saying 'em over and over and over again. And then when they do the impersonation, they're actually teaching it back to you. Yeah. Which is when they're really gonna internalize it. So I mean, what a great practice.
I think that, that nugget right there, I, you know, I think we, we probably should end on that. Not just cuz it's. The time of when we need to end, but also, cuz I think that is so important. I think that brings together a lot of the things we've talked about, which you know, that, that we've talked about in this show and what Sauers was saying.
So any last thoughts and then we'll, then we'll wrap it up. Sure.
[00:38:45] Coach Roz: And in its consistent with my last thoughts, when we had Sauers on the interview coaches like Sauers are so far ahead of the curve. They, they are, they are so far ahead [00:39:00] of, of, of what we're trying to accomplish. And, and when we get a vision of what these sours like coaches can be and how they can influence our youth and our community I get inspir.
I get inspired. I know that Phil, you are, you are literally a pastor and, and, and, and have preached and, and been in front of congregations. Sauers has a congregation of players and families that he's got unbelievable influence. So my final thoughts. Um, Where we can go with this, if coaching for character and the, and some of the, the suggestions that we make become part of the coach's dialogue and where this can go.
I, I get inspired with that. So that, that's my final thoughts for the for the day.
[00:39:59] Phil: And I'll say, I'll [00:40:00] go one step further and say, not only does Sauers and every coach out there, every one of you listening, you have more of an impact. I will say you have more of an impact than the vast majority of pastors have on their congregation.
You have more of an impact on your players than those pastors have on their congregation. And whether that's an indictment on the pastors or. I think more, I think more than that, it's actually saying the importance of a coach on a, a player's and a, a person's in a human's life. Because you have them not only more days a week, but you have them.
If they're youth coach at their impressionable ages where they're really finding and developing their identity. And that's just, again, it's something that I don't wanna overwhelm. What you said Roz is, is Sauers is well ahead of the curve. You Roz you're well ahead of the curve. If you're just getting started, don't like, be like, ah, there's no way I can get here.
This is way too much information. Take one [00:41:00] thing that we said, and. Implement it into your practice, into your life, into what you're doing, and then take another thing and implement that into, and then you can, you know, really take it to that next level. So with that, I just want to encourage you out there.
Hopefully this is all encouraging to you that we're doing here because this is something that we are, we absolutely love everything that we do. It's something that we want to help you to understand the things that we've been learning. All we're doing right now is, is sharing and, and helping you with things that we're learning and we've learned and continuing to learn.
So. That is our hope here. Again, go to the playmakers.org, to learn more about what Playmaker is doing, and there's the books that Roz has written and everything else.
So with all that folks, I do hope that you take everything that you're learning on this show and you use it to help you to be a better coach, to be a better parent, to be a better person.
Well, I hope [00:42:00] that encouraged you as much as it encouraged me and just reminded me of what we talked about during that episode. Just all these great leadership lessons that we need to be intentional. We need to remember to have fun. We need to work into our practices and work into our coaching, that character, that integrity, the things, the things that matter.
The things that matter in life, the things that matter. Outside the game and inside the game. if you can't tell that's my passion, that's my, why? To help others flourish and to make good things better. And I hope that this episode today helped you to do both of those things. And, you know, as we always talk about on this show,
Paul Jobson and Marcy, his wife are doing some great things with the warrior way. And it's warriorwaysoccer.com. You can find out about all the things they're doing there. Coaching the bigger game is a, is a thing that I work on with Christian DeVries, who was on this show a few episodes ago. We're doing some things there that, hopefully you can get [00:43:00] involved with. You can check out that episode that I did with him. If you want to learn more about that, you can go to coachingthebiggergame.Com. To find out all the details there as well. So with all that, I do hope just as I talked about at the end of the coaching character episode. That you take all that you're learning from this show and you use it to be a better parent, a better spouse, a better leader, a better friend. Better, whatever you're doing and that you continually remind yourself that soccer does explain life and leadership. Thanks a lot. Have a great week.